Nine typical themes in language courses

With Japanese, Chinese, Portuguese, Russian, Spanish, Italian, French and German audio language courses under my belt, I get an appreciation for people who devise and script these courses. I also noticed some odd similarities that keep popping up in each course, no matter the language.

1. A man and a woman book a room in a hotel, but they have different last names. Considering they meet and greet each other just one or two lessons earlier, and that they do not have any big conversations in between, you'll have to assume that they are not boyfriend and girlfriend. Could they be committing adultery? Or are they just enjoying a nooner?
2. When going out to dinner, the woman always eats a mixed salad as an appetizer. Why doesn't she get a nice chorizo? She's not anorexic is she? The man always has a soup, which is always too cold. When they "complain" about this, the people speak slowly, rationally and do not shout. (Yes, I always complain in this way...) Also everybody drinks a red wine. Nobody drinks bitter lemon, or Sprite.
   
3. People in language courses always go to a bar. No matter how many drinks you order, it always costs under ten euros. Probably because at this point you haven't learned any numbers over ten yet.
   
4. People always shop for fruit, souvenirs, a short sleeve shirt, and a packet of aspirin. People in language courses never buy stuff like CDs, a newspaper, sun glasses, tanning oil, box of tissues, condoms, KY jelly... you know... stuff you'd actually buy on vacation.
5. There are no children in language courses. Everybody you speak to is an adult. In fact, people over 65 do not exist in language courses. Everyone sounds like they're 24.
   
6. In any course, whatever location you are asking for, you're always only ten minutes away, and it's only down the street and to the right.
7. No language course has people dealing with the police, justice... or any kind of authority for that matter.
8. Except for one instance in the Japanese course, everybody has a job in an office setting. No one is a farmer. No one is a construction worker. Yes, there are desk clerks, waiters, shop assistants, but that's about as unambitious as it gets.
9. Every language course tells you four different ways to greet someone and three more to say your name, but none of them give you any clue how to tell someone to sod off.